A new day dawns

A new day dawns, yet my darkness lingers
Oh dear father my spirit weakens
To face this day do I dare awake
For the fear of failure makes my heart break

Hear my cry oh god above
For you are my right my rock my love
Let not the accuser my soul control
Father in heaven I am yours alone

Burn me break me consume me more
Till I am spotless, as white as snow
Teach me guide me and let me know
Your love is everlasting, forevermore

Anoint my lips that I may sing your praise
Move my heart and fill it with your grace
Hold me near and teach me to dance
That all the world may know we always have another chance

A picture of love

21st July 2015 is one of those days that will always be a part of my heart. A day I witnessed a picture unlike any other.

Me and my coworkers decided to visit Shishubhavan, an orphanage run by the Missionaries of Charity. What I experienced was something quiet different.

The sight of the nuns and volunteers from Spain feeding the differently abled children paralysed me. What I saw before me was a beautiful picture of love, patience and joy among the nuns and volunteers n even the children. I stood back.. simply watching, taking in quietly all that I could from what I saw.

While I just stood there. I saw my dear friend add to the picture her loving presence. She waltzed around the room connecting with the children and the volunteers with a radiant glow on her face.

Here I was, in awe, getting a glimpse of how the lord was working.  There was only 1 language that existed.... the language of love.

Before this picture I was a spectator and I pray that soon I would be a part of the picture itself, for another little girl to see and love.

love of my God

how do i describe the love of God?
how do i describe my Fathers love?
its like a river that has no bank
it is a river that breaks all dams
my Fathers love is every last
my Fathers love keeps me singing
if i was a soul without a body i would fly
i would fly to the heights heavens and back
but even these words are not enough
for my own thoughts cannot comprehend this feeling
mind mind shuts down when it even tries to think of it while my body burns with His presence

but how i grieve when i see lost souls
how i which they knew what i know
that they felt what i feel
for i know my God is stronger than any drug
His love is greater than any love

but i am only a mere human
i who am myself struggling to live this life
what can i do?
so i lay my life at my Lords feet
i empty myself at His alter
and i ask that He use me and my friends everyday till His work is done

lifes little games

here is what i think of life- it can be your worst enemy of your greatest friend.
when its you friend it will paint you a pretty picture. one filled with unicorns and fairies. everything seems possible. everything thing goes according to plan (if u have one). even the toughest wars seem winnable.
i love it when life is like that. i mean which self respecting living creature wouldnt. the day is filled with laughter and nights are filled with the sweetest of dreams. every day you feel like you are having a sugar rush. on really good days people may even suspect you are on drugs. you smile so much your cheeks may just tear apart and you laugh so much you can barely stand.
we all love those days dont we? when you wouldnt mind hugging your sworn enemy. forgivness is in the air and everyone are free to go according to their whims and fancies without fear of judgment

then there are the days when life is your enemy. just when you are floating on cloud nine. it swirls around like a vicious snake and bits your ass. its as if it got board of all the happiness n decided some drama was needed. like a mad scientist it pulls and probes even bit of you while muffling your cries. every movement is so painfull. every plan reveals a dead end. and worst of all there is no relief. one pain follows another like the hammering of a nail. like a ragged doll even the smile on your face is stitched on.
the world around you a dark and desolate. nothing seems to make sense. nothing seems to matter. you dont know if you are moving forward or backward, right or left, up or down. all you can feel is the faint beating of your heart while life like a roman king sits on its high throne gulping wine, challenging you to fight if you can.
everyone is an enemy everyone a self centered creature. you can see saliva dripping down their ghastly teeth waiting for you to show the slightest hint of defeat

oh my queen

oh my queen
as i brush your hair
i wonder if they were always this white?
did they always gliter in the rays of the sun?
did they always shine so bright?

oh my queen
as i brush your hair
i wonder were they always this short?
were they always this thin and unrully?
were they always full of knots?

oh my queen
as i brush your hair
i wonder how were you when u were young?
did you play in the gardens?
did you sing with the birds?
did you laugh till you dropped?

oh my queen
as i brush your hair
i wonder if the stories are true
did you walk down the street with a glass in you hand?
were you rejected for a patch or two?

oh my queen
as i brush your hair
i wonder what lies in your heart
is it pain or anger?
surrender or regret?
or simply an endless need to fight?

oh my queen
as i brush your hair
i see your frame is small
you hardly eat
and love t sleep
i wonder..... will i grow to look like you

a night to remember

the evening of 19th september 2011 began with an ordinary plan 4 a movie.
primal as usual was late (n by late i mean a whole 45mins LATE ) wich was expected

we enter the theater n the ticket collecter asks me for an I.D CARD which was in my other purse which was at home.... now i know i know im short n look like a 7std girl but seriously...... when i say im 21 it means i am 21 :(  :( :( i mean d movie didnt even have any ADULT stuff in it :( .... anyways the guy in charge asked me my date of birth n i guess since i said it so fluently he was convinced (note this is not a tip for u underage people )

now the theater had 3 screens n pradeep had the tickets for the movie - mere brother ki dulhan ( my brothers bride) so v let him leade the way
after making our selves comfortable we saw the beginning credits of final destination 5 (screen 3). i immidiately started saying that v were in the wrong screen room. but my 2 lovelly n extreamlly smart companions saind that i was crazy n should be thankful that i even got in... so i kept my smal mouth shut.. n wat do u know?? the movie final destination 5 began :) (ha now whose laughing... whose the crazy one now huh huh ??).... so v push pradeep to go out n see which is the actuall screen room v need to go to.
meanwhile.... primal n i r wondering y does the movi seem to be double imaged?? n y is noone complaning ?? its only when v were leaving did v see the other viewers wearing 3D glasses .

now we were in screen 1 which was where we were supposed to be in the first place. luclly the movie was scheduled to start 15mins after FD5 so v didnt miss a thing.:) :) :) however a few minutes before intermission primal looses her clip. we spent some time of the intermission searching for it n finally found it !!!! in her bag X( X( X(

after the movie v didnt really know how to go home.... so since pradeep brought his scooter v went on a triple ride... which was quiet funny as pradeep is a hefty fello :)

we finally reached home safely n full of popcorn coke n laughter in our bellies :)

lessons learned
1) amulyas advice- always carry an i.d proof especially if u look like a child
2) pradeeps  proceduer- if u want to watch a movie in screen 1 first go to screen 3... watch 5mins of the movie there n then come to screen 1... dont forget to msg ur frnd to get out of screen3
3) primals psychedelics (i dont thik the work exists ) - if ur searching for something check in ur bag first.. it will save your friends a lot of trouble u a lot of embarrassment

what is important???

when the Lord came to earth...

it was not important that he be treated as a king..... when he was tempted it was not important that he could turn the stones into bread..... when he was taken to trial it was not important that he be judged as innocent..... when he forgave it wasn't important that they where rich or poor...

what was important that he came to serve and love.... during his temptation he had come to seek the spirit..... he had come to die and save us..... he forgave all who humbled themselves

what is important for you???